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So, I got back last night. I'm still on Orlando time, so I've been up since 5ish, and I really hope my body gets back into the cycle of things before I go back to work on Monday.

This would be a huge, epic, super post, but I'm still too drained to even think about going into massive detail. It'll be a big post, more than likely, but it's more like bullet points... without pictures. I don't feel like uploading pictures right now. I will, but I really need to learn how to make them quicker to upload.

Day 1: Downtown Disney

First, we got to San Jose around 5 AM for our flight which left around sixish. My dad was saying he was getting lost and pissing me off because my father is a dick like that. Then we leave. Pretty empty plane. Empty planes are good. Lots of space. Layover in Houston, where they have Wendy's. It makes me happy.

We land in Orlando and we're both so jazzed because we're there! Then we get on the magical express and we ride over to Disneyworld. It stars to POUR while we're in the bus, but it lets down by the time we're at the resort. We all cheered when we "entered" Walt Disney World. In hindsight, we wonder why we cheered so much. Ignorance is bliss.

We check in, and they're doing the hustle at our hotel. It scares me. Plus, my camera died and I didn't check the batteries before we left (because I actually switched them and never used the damned thing, to my knowledge. I must have left it on...), so I don't get any pictures of the first night. Downtown Disney is nice. They claim to have a brail map, but we feel it and feel no bumps that MAKE UP the damned language. The Christmas store is RIGHT THERE! And I run inside and prepare to spend half my money. Only I don't. Ornaments are fail. FAIL! World of Disney... also FAIL! Merch on day 1? Piss ass poor! Plus, the place where we were eating dinner was supposed to be right next door. It is, but the restaurant is CRAZY FAR. We're walking in the heat and humidity and just dying. Finally we make it, and the food sucks! SUCKS! We get home and promptly collapse. Day 1? Suck.

Day 2: Magic Kingdom

We get to the park before it opens. Watch the opening ceremony. Disneyworld music is really annoying and happy. Something about pixie dust and keys to seven magical lands. God, it was bad. But we don't care. We run to Space Mountain. It's different from Disneyland. They have two tracks. Left and right. We go left. The ride only has one row of seats instead of two, and they don't take your picture. But it's Space Mountain, and it rules. Right side is so much better, though. Keep that in mind. We rode it ten times overall, we know. The Stitch ride wasn't that good. He looked at me, though. Stitch knows things. He knows how I love him. And we went on Philarmagic. That's the best thing in the park. Seriously. I'm not lying. I want that in Disneyland SO MUCH. Plus, the store? DONALD CENTRAL!!!!!! I spent money there, and continued to do so. They had three Caballeros stuff! Snatched that up quickly, I did. Big Thunder Mountain was also kind of lame. I like it, but Sarah wanted more. Splash Mountain was nice. We did a LOT Of rides the first day. PLUS THEY HAD DONALD!!! I MET DONALD! Well, the first time I met Donald. He was dressed up like a lumberjack. It pleased me. Plus we ran into the parade almost on accident. They had people dressed up like Robin Hood and Friar Tuck!!!! YAY! Dinner was at this place called Tony's, which is decked out like Lady and the Tramp. Not very good food.

Day 3: Magic Kingdom

We're back, because of all the parks only the Magic Kingdom merits more than one day (really), do most of the same stuff over. We start with the Ohana breakfast so I can get my mandatory Stitch picture, which I do. Mickey demands a picture with me. The tool understood the hate and tried to sway me. It didn't work. The food was decent, but it was SO FREAKING COLD IN THE DAMNED PLACE. Everything got cold quickly. It made me sad. Lunch at the Crystal Palace, where we met the Winnie the Pooh characters. Also win. Plus, we saw this couple who were married but seriously had to be minors. We think we saw a baby bump. Vanessa said we needed to take a picture with them. Alas, it was after the fact. We watched a show at the front of the castle. Donald was the star. I took a shitload of pictures. Donald gets respect. He doesn't get merch, but he gets respect! Dinner was at the Liberty Tree. Again, character meal. This time with classic Disney characters. Goofy, Minnie, Pluto, Chip and Dale. Before that, I got a picture with Scrooge!!!!! Disneyworld does Disneyland better in the random character department, I give it that much. The Christmas parade started at 7. We watched Mickey's Twas the night before Christmas. A musical show. The guy who sang was good, if it wasn't just dubbed. But it was so humid and there were so many people. Very uncomfortable. Then we hit up the castle so that we could watch the next show. During said show, it starts to pour and the cancel the show. And I mean POUR. We got drenched. Ten minutes later, when it died down, we went and rode Space Mountain 7 times! But the next Christmas parade was at 10:45, and Disneyworld enjoys sucking the life out of you with its humidity. We didn't make it. We watched the fireworks and bolted. Oh, and I might have seen Rebecca Budig, but I'm not sure.

Day 4: Hollywood Studios. Super Soap Weekend.

The reason I picked this time to go to Disneyworld. Super Soap weekend. It sucked. We got to the park an hour early. I saw SO MANY HARDCORE SOAP FANS. And some of them had been camping out for 15 hours. The line to get ONE ticket was unbearable. I got Laura Wright, because Susan Lucci was already out of tickets. Finally, we get on Tower of Terror. Watch that annoying ass video again. It's different from the Disneyland version, and I like the Disneyland version more because it gets things done quicker and I don't like to wait. Next door was the rockin' roller coaster starring Aerosmith (with a cameo by Matt Dallas). That was REALLY fun. It goes so fast so quick, but it's short. As I'm walking around I see people lined up. As luck would have it, the GH stars (some of them) were going to drive down for the first talk show of the event. Laura Wright is first. Tyler Christopher. Jason Cook. Greg Vaughan and Kelly Monaco. Jason Thompson and Kimberly McCollough (I screamed KIM! and the people in front of me were afraid). But we went to the Great Movie ride behind the Sorcerer's hat. It was the worst ride in the park. Unbearably slow and uninteresting and it spent too much time on stupid movies that I don't like or care about. Never again on that ride. OR Voyage of the Little Mermaid. Here's the thing about Hollywood studios. You have like 4 actual RIDES in the entire park. The rest are just shows. It's fail. So much fail. We watch Muppet Vision (only once... it's the same as at Disneyland, but Disneyland doesn't drain your soul so it just seems better). Along the way I see Laura at her autograph station, and Brandon Barrash and Cameron Mattheson. The Sci Fi Dine In theater is a horrible place to eat. It has good onion rings, though. We still kill more time. We actually just spend an hour in the ABC restaurant because we NEED to kill that much time at Disneyworld. We go eat Dinner at Hollywood and Vine. Not very good. And it started to rain again. Luckily, it ended before my appointment with Laura. I scared her, because she wasn't expecting a huge mexican man. I told her she was the most gorgeous woman on television, and she was happy. Afterwards, we have to kill MORE time because of Fantasmic at eight. We go to the Art of Disney show. Mushu is in it. SO FUNNY! If we had known about that, we would have gone to it so many times.

Fantasmic doesn't suck, but it isn't the second coming of Christ. It's basically the soarin' of Disney shows. It's decent enough, but the way people talk about it you assume it's just something so much more intense than it actually is. I think that's part of the reason I didn't like it so much. It was a letdown because of its own hype. It did have Pochahontas, though. That earns my respect.

Day 5: Epcot

We figured that since Hollywood studios sucked, we would go out of schedule and hit up Epcot. We thought it would have more stuff to do. We thought wrong. We go on Soarin' first, so Sarah can judge for herself if the ride is just a ride and not this religious experience. She concurs. Test Track is a lot of fun, but it sucks at first. When it starts going fast then it rules. Mission Space is odd. I think it jacked up my bladder, actually. The store there is nice. The World Showcase opens at 11, and we're one of the first people in line for the Three Caballeros ride! IT WAS GREAT! Before that, I bought more merch of my boys. Then, the lady at the store tells me Sombrero Donald shows up to take pictures. Life is good. Except I wait two and a half hours for him to even GET There. During the wait period, we take a picture with Mulan and Mushu. Finally, I get my picture and I am pleased. We go to the pavilion. Sarah spends like an hour and a half in the stupid Japan store. I rest outside. Funny thing about Epcot... characters show up randomly. Dopey. Aurora. Mary Poppins. They were all RIGHT THERE and there was like no line for any of them. We thought about watching Illuminations, but went to Downtown Disney instead. I go into the art of Disney store. Monica Willis is the artist. I commission an Oliver sketch and it makes me SO HAPPY!!!!

Day 6: Epcot

We're back at Epcot. I get a picture with REGULAR Donald right away. We go on Test Track. We watch this god awful Ellen thing for 45 minutes. Ride the Three Caballeros ride again. Go to Nine Dragons which has the best Chinese food EVER! And then go to the Magic Kingdom to ride more rides. While we're there, Space Mountain breaks down. I see it lit up. It's amazing. I have pictures. Back to Downtown Disney, where I get MORE sketches from Monica. This time Gopher and the Three Caballeros. SO MUCH WIN! Alas, given the evil system that is the WDW Transportation system, we miss our appointment at 8 for the Coral Reef restaurant. I wanted to eat near the fish. We go home instead.

Day 7: Animal Kingdom.

We have a reservation for character breakfast at 8:15. Donald is there. And Daisy. Some little girl pukes right behind me. Donald steps in it. Sad. Mickey was there. And Goofy. Why couldn't one of them step in the vomit? The breakfast sucks, but I get another picture with Donald, so it's okay. We go to Expedition Everest, which is the best *ride* there. We go on that six times. I think I see Eddie Alderson from One Life getting a fast pass, but I don't ask. Sarah feels sick (between her feet killing her and her stomach on that day, she cost much time), so I leave her, with her permission, which she offered first, and go do the animal viewing. I see Tigers. They're not white, but I make due. She catches up with me eventually and we go take a picture with Pochahontas. I was going to take a picture with Rafiki, too, but these random Mexican fools cut in front of me. And it was like a family of eight. So I was bitter and we went on the Safari instead. It's impossible to get good pictures on the Safari because it moves around so much. Fail. Our reservation at the Rainforest Cafe is next. VERY good food. After that we go to watch the parade. We get right in front. Donald is there. We leave when Mickey is at the end. Tool gets no love if I have an option! Back to the hotel, where I see someone named Scott Snyder is on the package claim log (it was left open!). Scott Clifton's real last name? Snyder. And it was SSW. And he doesn't have a job so he can't afford a big hotel. Logic wins out and I don't STALK his room, but I do look around, very intensely, as I walk everywhere looking for him. I never saw him. We do a little bit of packing before our final reservation at the California Grill at the Contemporary resort. Before we get there, they have a store that was playing High School Musical 1 music. Very loud. Ugh. By the time we flee, the taint is already deep in my soul. The food is decent. We don't order a *main* Dish because those are all like 40 bucks a plate (not that I don't have the money to buy them, but they also look pretty unappealing). At 8, you can watch the fireworks from the balcony outside. Very pretty, but so cold. I think I got sick. By that time, when we're back on the bus, we decide to just sleep in and pack. No more parks. We're too dead.

Day 8: Return!

My three caballeros mug is broken. I can't get a replacement, but I get my money back. When I go and check more stuff, I see that another thing I bought was broken. I go to the same people. They talk shit about me while I'm standing behind them. It pisses me off. We leave Disneyworld, and I'm glad.

Don't get me wrong, I had fun. I'm glad I went. But if I ever go again, it won't be nearly as long (five days, tops!). Disneyland IS a better place to go, because it's so much more relaxed and the size isn't so scary.

Hell, I could go to work tomorrow. I won't, but I could.


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:13 am (UTC)
Wow, lots of stuff. Can't wait to see pics. Sorry about the fail that was SSW. So um, you only got to meet one person? What the hell?
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:17 am (UTC)
Yeah, I only got to meet one person. In theory, I could have met two, possibly, but that would have required going around the line and THEN basically picking from the scraps that were left. And even then, I probably would have only had a standby ticket, which doesn't guarantee any time with the actor. I wasn't willing to go through that again for a *maybe*.

Clearly, I'm not hardcore.

You'll see the pics. I ain't deleting them from my camera for a long, long time.
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:34 am (UTC)
I thought you would be HARDCORE, if I was there, we could have split up and I would have gotten you another ticket. I wanna see pics of the merch!!!
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:36 am (UTC)
I thought I would be hardcore, too!!!! But these people are like Dove Lady hardcore!!! DOVE LADY HARDCORE!!!!

I didn't take pictures of the merch yet, because some of it is with Sarah still and some of it is shipping back to me.
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:45 am (UTC)
.. Did you just text me? ahaha, I just got a text from you.

Break it down, so how much total on merch, believe me, the old ppl want to know!!
Nov. 21st, 2008 02:53 am (UTC)
Nah. I texted you like two hours ago.

It was about 2800 total. We'll say I spent 800 dollars on food, because my brain really isn't able to actually number crunch. So, give or take, about two grand on merch. So much merch. I don't have room for it, but that didn't stop me.

Nothing stopped me!
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )