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Let's talk family problems, shall we?

Not immediate family problems, mind you, but extended family problems. So, I've got my half-uncle (who I just found out is my half-uncle like... two years ago... not that it makes me love the guy any less, but that came as a shock) who lives in SoCal with his wife, my Aunt, and my cousins, second cousins, and so on, and so forth. He's ALWAYS had the same house, and it has ALWAYS had a shitload of children, ever since I was a little kid. I love that about the place, don't get me wrong, but seriously, it's a fucking madhouse there. It finally seemed like they were going to have a decent sized house to themselves, but that is not the case, because, as it turns out... my two eldest cousins are crazy... well, one of them is... the other is just a whack job... again, I love said cousins, but damn, they got issues... and they got kids...

So, we'll break this down...
Aunt and Uncle
Eldest Son and Eldest son's ex-wife (yes, the ex-wife is living with her ex-in-laws... and her ex-husband...)
Eldest son's four children
Middle daughter
Middle daughter's three children
Youngest son

That, right there, is 13 people living in the same three room house. It has two bathrooms, one of which hardly ever works. The house is kind of nice (when one ignores the fact that it's always torn the fuck up because of all the people who come inside), and there's a back house that they might be using... which my daddy helped build...

But, that's not all... at any random time they can have their nieces staying with them, each of whom have at least two children. So, add another six and possibly more for the men in their lives... and that's damned near 20 people. No wonder my poor uncle has anger issues. And this is all assuming that they don't continue to spawn. Eldest son is only 33 or so, because he and ex-wife had their first kid at 16. I love said child, she's probably my favorite cousin, but I'm just saying...

Guess we won't be staying at that house again when we go to Ventura.